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12.03.2010

Think of the Gators

Despite what that chap in the picture above might have you believe, it's cold right now in Florida. I awoke this morning to sub-freezing temperatures. After careful discussion with my twenty-month-old daughter, we came to a conclusion.

Alligators here are very cold. Won't you help them get warm?

The Florida department of wildlife estimates an alligator population of nearly two million in the Sunshine State. They live in swamps and marshes near you. You drive past them every day, on your way to work or school.

They are the silent, green minority, and they are cold.

How can I help? you might be asking yourself.

Lyla and I are glad you did. It's simple, actually. Go to your nearest bakery and purchase a loaf of artisan-style sourdough bread. They like the big rounds. Then, buy two pounds of heirloom tomatoes and a couple of cups of heavy cream, and make up a big pot of tomato bisque. Make sure there's fresh basil in it.

Then, all you need to do is keep the soup warm while you hike into the marshes, dispensing your tasty wares to the needy and deserving reptiles.

With Christmas right around the corner and many alligators struggling to stay warm at night, your kindness is much appreciated. These alligators are cold. Won't you help them get warm?

4 comments:

Aaron Polson said...

And then they eat me, right?

Daniel W. Powell said...

Sometimes charity hurts.

Anonymous said...

If you are light on your feet and liberal with the basil, then your charity will pay dividends...feast your taste buds on the full flavor of organically grown basil feed gator tail at your next dining excursion!!

j$

Daniel W. Powell said...

Evening J,

Good call. When are you hopping on the big bird so we can smack golf balls?